Finding Yourself Series: Let's Be Adults
There comes a time, or multiple times, in life when we look at the craziness around us and think "how did this become such a big deal?"We get into fights with friends-and this one or that one won't apologize. We go on our partner's phone-and turns out they hate your mother. It's rare that "what's the worst that can happen?" actually isn't a rhetorical question anymore. But its answer is something we have to face when we're presented with new, important data that we need to address.
You can't be afraid of the 'what if's.' That doesn't mean you're wrong for being nervous or scared, it just can't get in the way of you living your life to its best potential.
Sometimes you need to let people go, and accept that it's not on the best of terms. If it's in your control--maybe you slipped up, maybe you fell down the rabbit hole--it's okay. Just sit down with yourself and figure out how you truly want to handle the situation, and what you think would provide the best outcome. If the situation at hand, however, is actually to someone else's doing--then that's when we need to figure out if we're being exposed to a side of someone's character we maybe were too nervous to pay attention to before.
If you want to really find yourself, then you need to cut the drama. You don't have time to focus on the irrelevancies of the "what-ifs" that people waste time mulling over in order to excuse themselves for being upset or acting the way that they do. You don't have the space to do this and to also be growing as a person. They don't go hand in hand--in fact, they often knock each other out.
It sucks because if you're going to accept that people are who they act like they are, then you're going to have to make a lot of calls for change. That change can be confrontation and productive conversation, or it can mean walking away when you realize you're only wasting your breath.
Cut the drama: it's time to confront people about how you feel rather than pretending like it's fine, or hoping that they'll pick up on your passive aggressive cues. They probably will, but if you're not going to address it, oftentimes they'll wonder why they should bother with it either?
If you're going to work on finding yourself, you're going to have to work on being okay with walking away and keeping these events to yourself and a select amount of people who will be of service to helping you stay on the right path, rather than work completely against it.
Stay tuned for next week's topic: Playing the Fool
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